#on a side note i really want to see the show delve deeper into the biblical horror aspects of lucifer.....

[jujuflakes]

eldritch lucifer save me... eldritch lucifer.....save me eldritch lucifer

[jessicaslittlelovesickmess]

Act two

Pairing: Larissa Weems x Reader

Warnings: hurt/comfort but not really, Ophelia is trash, Larissa is bbygirl, lesbians being lesbians, awkward

Pt1: Andromeda

Larissa awaited as the parents rolled in, she greeted each with a smile before she saw Andromeda and Wednesday walking. Her breath caught in her throat you were still just as gorgeous as you had been during your time at Nevermore.

You smiled softly once you caught sight of the blonde, the girls rolling their eyes Larissa was quick to make an appearance. “Y/n, It’s been forever but I’m so glad to see you again” her eyes sparkled never once dimming with Morticia’s side comments.

“Likewise Larissa” your voice was soft as your hands rested on the girl’s shoulders “It’s been too long” it was becoming awkward. Morticia cleared her throat “moving along with the pleasantries the girls had something they wanted to show us”.

Gomez nodded like a lost dog, “well I guess I’ll see you later” you nodded before Andromeda had dragged you off in tow of Wednesday. Larissa was surprised not to have Ophelia with you but she noted the wedding rings on your necklace.

-

You didn’t see much of the blonde during the day until after dark, you stood on the dock where you both would once sit watching the stars. “I see you kept your promise” Larissa called as she neared closer, her eyes shining in the dim light.

“I wasn’t going to name Andy that at first but Ophelia insisted it” you sighed not turning around “you never came to the wedding”. Larissa’s brows furrowed “Wedding? Y/n/n I was never invited to a wedding” she spoke softly as stood by your side “I wrote out the invitations and Ophelia sent them out” .

“I’m telling you that I never got an invite but maybe it’s best I hadn’t gone” she breathed out looking down at you “why’s that?” You asked almost sadly. “I probably would’ve tried to stop the wedding” Larissa shrugged, you didn’t know how to feel before the blonde pulled you to sit with her.

“You couldn’t have Morticia so would go after Ophelia?” You scoffed you were angry but you weren’t understanding the underlining of Larissa’s words. “It was never about them Y/n” her hand found your thigh “sure I had chased after Morticia at one stage but she wasn’t as gorgeous as you, she didn’t make my breath catch and words disappear she wasn’t you”.

You turned to face the woman “I was in love with you but I knew I would never stand a chance, I never stood a chance with Tish either but… it was you who I had wanted. Ophelia knew that hell everyone besides you knew, but I was a coward then and the night I asked you to the Raven I knew it was a loss and I was too late”

“Ophelia had won the girl we were both fighting for, while I took lessons from Morticia she buttered you up. I was scared of rejection because who in their right mind would even date me” she laughed but it wasn’t humorous. “Me” you stated looking at her with tears in her eyes “Larissa I had loved you and I told you that night but it wasn’t the same anymore, I thought I was- that you wanted Morticia because oh god” you cried. “I had hated myself and you were so gorgeous and Tish was stunning but now my life has fallen to shit Lissa” you sobbed breaking the blondes heart.

“What do you do when pretty isn’t pretty enough?”

“Ophelia didn’t love me at first but we made it work after we had Andy, we fell in and out of love for many years until she passed” Larissa pulled you into her side “I’m sorry for your loss” she whispered kissing your head. “It’s okay, I’m sorry for rambling” you blinked tears away “it’s nothing really” Larissa smiled before her eyes glimmered.

You both sat silently for a moment “would you like to go to the wethervane tomorrow? I believe I still owe you that date” you nodded softly as you leaned into her warmth.

The next day you both delved deeper into your lives from since you had left Nevermore, Ophelia had been a doctor and you were now a writer. While Larissa had gone to Cambridge and then set a new start at Nevermore, you had gotta married young and had Andromeda not long after. Larissa never married or had children, that was a life she only saw with you she told herself what a dream to come home every day to a family and you more so.

Larissa’s gaze never wavered the entire morning as you spoke “would you do it again?” She asked softly “I wouldn’t have Andromeda otherwise” you shrugged with a sad smile. “She’s everything to me, the good and bad. I wouldn’t know a life without her she’s my girl”.

The blonde nodded along “although I did often wonder what it would have been like if I never married Ophelia. If I accepted your request to the Raven would I still have Andy I was so hurt, Lissy. You really hurt me and I let you willingly carve my heart like it was clay, I love you Larissa I really do- did but it didn’t stop my fantasies”

"I often wondered too, if I had swallowed my fears and asked you from the start would we be here? sitting so closely at the wethervane as if the years hadn't passed us. would we have children of our own or would you become that famous ballerina you had dreamed of being, I paid attention even when you thought I wasn't like when you changed from glasses to contacts. I prefer the glasses they seemed more natural and I got to see your hands more as they adjusted them. I listened to every career choice you had over the years and although I want to change the outlook of normies and outcasts a very selfish part of me"

Larissa swallowed hard "Made me stay at Nevermore hoping that you would have a child it didn't matter who with as long as I would get to see you one last time". You looked at her with tears in your eyes but a goofy grin "You're the principal Larissa, you could've just held a reunion but you truly are the sweetest soul I have ever met and I'm sorry I didn't try to reach out my geeky girl".

"Do you think we could ever try again?" she asked with a light blush as she ducked her head slightly "Slowly but surely"

[dreamwreaver]

Oh, One Hell of a Team... How I adore you. Now THAT'S a way to establish Charlie and Alastor's characters while simultaneously juxtaposing them in a beautiful manner. God, I have practically been putting this song on repeat ever since I first heard it.

Like it really delves into Alastor's manipulation, spinning this picture of being the perfect business partner for her, catering to her every need, pointing out how she's lacking, that she NEEDS his help because, well, he can make her dreams come true! Of course, Charlie doesn't buy it, rightfully so, doubting his intentions but doesn't deny his help, after all, he does have everything she needs for the hotel to flourish. With all their differences, both of them recognize the potential in each other, wanting the other to join by their side, showing that, through becoming each other's strength, they could make one hell of a team together.

This song is amazing because both characters display a deeper level of nuance and maturity that the show didn't capture well enough. Charlie isn't being beaten down here for her naivete, if anything, she displays her intelligence remarkably well, aware of his dubious behavior. She's expressed as Alastor's equal, his compliment, one that can truly challenge his own perspective and he respects her for that. As much as he doesn't believe in her dream for redemption, he wants her to fight for it, to show what he knows she's capable of and most importantly, he wants to set her free from her doubts and the restraints she shackled onto herself. (God, I swooned at the "No, I only wanna set you free line," why aren't they a thing??)

I would also like to note that there's the whole mirror imagery in the music video, that Alastor and Charlie are each other's reflections, that they see themselves in the other and vice versa. This song is literally the best, right alongside Heaven 2 Hell which is more in line with their canon personalities while One Hell of a Team explores the depths of their dynamic.

Whether or not Season 2 releases Charlie and Alastor's song, I'm just thankful for such a wonderful song made by passionate artists who saw Alastor and Charlie's potential and made a banger of a song out of it.

Also, thank you for the Rambley gif, it made my morning much brighter. Much appreciated.

— rambling nonnie

Hi there Rambley!

Yes absolutely, I adore One Hell of a Team and Heaven 2 Hell. Among some of my favorite songs for them that are specifically about hazbin.

To be quite honest though, possibly my favorite song that has the possibility of their dynamic (and something ngl I apply to all my ships but fits best here) is the Real Tuesday Weld's Me and Mr. Wolf. It's an electroswing song that is playing on the juxtaposition between who seems like the wolf and who really is. The video is also a fun trippy rubberhose style animation reminiscent of the era it's based on. Highly recommend.

Possibly my favorite part, "If I taste you, will we know? If love kills, or makes you whole? Tears you o-pen, takes you home?"

And there are obvious songs from other franchises that fit them. A good friend of mine made a whole Spotify playlist for me based on songs she thought fit them.

[rosekisspeach]

TAROT READING//Mingkey Sexual Attraction - Bum's pt. 1

Date: 5/Feb/2024 Marker: Transparent Umbrella - SHINee Deck of Cards: Trungles' Star Spinner Tarot (Inclusive, Diverse, LGBTQ Theme); The Romance Angels Oracles; Manara Erotic Oracles

Notes Upfront:

I don't ask my cards questions that I already have answers;

I don't prey on information I should not know;

I respect their personal lives and;

This is for FUN ONLY.

✦ I also want to share the "reading-come-true" moment about taem that he truly cares about his art and what kind of artist he is becoming, please send love to his bubble ✦

In the following sexual attraction readings, be aware everything is "delulu" and I am just saying what I am seeing. Don't read this if you only see them as platonic friends/co-workers. . . . . .

Bum's part 1 - Subconsciousness Temptation [...] -> Garden [...] -> Flow of Inspiration Action: Swords 8, Wheel of Fate, Page of Cups Reverse, Empress Reverse, Lovers R Consciousness: Passion, Reconciliation, Wedding, Honeymoon Subconsciousness: Temptation of Pleasure, Garden at the top of the World, Flow of Inspiration

Before I present you the readings, let me introduce you my oracle cards, and the layout meaning. We have the romance angel oracles (an optimistic they/then) that delves into mingkey's consciousness, and Manara erotic oracles (a cheerful and charming lady) to unpack their subconsciousness. Each subconsciousness card is the result of three action cards, and two consciousness cards. Thus, I group these readings by the subconsciousness part, while unpacking the reading from top (action) to bottom (subconsciousness) , left to right (the energies deepen/hide deeper that the far right is what they "value" the most in this relationship). In the end, I will give an overall summary that includes all of these cards. I know this is confusing, and I will try my best to explain ++ I will also include the descriptions of oracles, so you can also interpret with flexibility.

Group 1: Temptation of Pleasure

"Don't you want me? ...Take me, I'm naked! A throaty voice from secret dreams will make them look into your eyes. Reality will disintegrate, the mirrored corridors of desires will capture you both, together, body and soul."

This reading really gives the same energy that I received from bummie's view on mingkey - insecurities, self-restraint, and self-love. The question here is not whether if bummie finds ming attrative. Of course he dose. Objectively, everyone finds ming good looking and physical appearing. But why wouldn't bummie acknowledge it like taem or jjong in blunt honesty? Not using his aegyo tone and sweet words anymore? We have a 8 of swords as the first card of bummie's action - Don't do it! Kibum shouts it to himself. He retreats his hand, closes his eyes, and stops himself from showing fondness towards ming despite the passion flares like butterflies in his stomach. He is cautious, tip toeing and giving just enough for the fan services. Isn't it cute that bummie touches ming's arm when laughing, as if the laughter is an enough distraction. As if we won't notice how long his fingers lingering on. He puts on the cold mask, keeps hims in distance, but he is not blind nor heartless. Bum senses their mutual attraction - the fate of them being inseparable like the two sides of a coin - that ming also senses (spoil alert!), and it scares him. Remember the 10 of coins dropped in bummie's view? We have similar energy here. Bummie treats ming as a loyal companion, a close family member, and he acts as it's enough for him. Instead of accepting the truth, bum is trapped in the mud of desire and maintains the status quo (it drives ming insane!!). Yet...the card is reversed, and we ask, bummie, you know you're not acing the "fake till you make it" play right?

Ten of Coins/Page of Cups

And ming is indeed that exception because he is Choi Minho. He is someone bummie loved and continued loving. He is from bummie's past, a reconciliation bummie vowed to him and his younger self, and the now, the future, the forever. It is too hard to resist the temptation, no wonder deep in bummie's mind, he asks assertively:

Don't you want me? Minho-ah. Take me, I'm all yours. I am forever yours.

.

.

.

Oracle reading of Temptation of Pleasure:

"Pleasure is a demon, but it's your demon. It is sometimes an unbound call that shatters and dwarfs reason and logic. It is not just desire, it is an instinctual need that forces your being to find satisfaction. If the need for pleasure is accepted, not denied, it becomes less of an instinctual force, but rather a right of your inner self to a sexual release and a sexual identity. Pleasure ceases to be a secret world and becomes a harmonious part of what you are."

Group 2: Garden at the top of the World

"I am in a place where I cannot be hurt. You are not invited...yet. I don't know the road you must take to reach me. But here, I am safe, and from here, I can love you."

Seeing this card, I immediately thought about the left-on-read messages and how I unpacked the situation as bummie healing himself instead of purely hurting ming. It is true, bummie only loves Ming from distance, from somewhere he feels safe, and Ming is not allowed inside just yet. We have the reversed Empress in action demonstrating that bummie is trying everything to act content and fulfilling in his current romantic relationship. To pretend he does not need Ming’s care and love when murmuring Ming’s name after getting drunk. The empress card goes with bummies zodiac sign that he needs to learn about love not just as an ideological concept, but also accepting what his body wants - the blunt nature of sensation. Bum wants a stable relationship (or more like family structure) that he only secretly calls it marriage. But…he doesn’t believe he can ever have it (poor baby) thus the wedding card in conscience. Marrying ming sounds impossible, even absurd, and this is why he only loves ming in distance. This energy appeared in bummie’s view too!!

Minho, you are cruel. It is just fan service for you.

.

.

.

Oracle reading of Garden at the top of the World:

“There are times in life when a person needs to face battles, conflicts, and uncompromising fights. With every battle, either won or lost, there are scars, pains, and hurts. It's especially hard when life seems cruel and unfair, and when others seem intent on crushing us down and destroying what we hold dear. Even then, though, there is a safe place for us. Some of us know that place. Some are building it. And some are still searching for it. But it exists. A place where body and soul can rest and breathe. Where we can't be hurt, and we are free to forgive and heal.”

Group 3: Flow of Inspiration

“My love flows like the conversation of two souls in a sunny summer afternoon. I may disappear at the first sign of disharmony, but while I am here, we can fly together on heavenly winds. My hands may know your body, but my lips know your soul.”

This is what kibum meant in the Live Alone episode that the shooting was a good day for ming and him. In the days their energies match up, it feels like, literally, a honeymoon spent together. They laugh, they flirt, they smile at each other that makes us wonder if what they really want is to kiss and make out. Pining each other on the wall so they can taste the alcohol residual between teeth and tongue. Bum feels it too, and he can’t help but cling to these moments because he knows there will be “bad” days. Days full of anger, frustration, and disappointment. Days he realized he is not dating ming and what they do is only fan service in many eyes. We again see the reversed lover card dropped (which I hardly find surprising), meaning bummie has learnt to accept not being able to date Ming that he treats himself w those good days and not feeling helpless when it cannot last longer than he hopes.

.

.

.

Oracle reading of Flow of Inspiration:

“What is inspiration? Inspiration is a connection with something that doesn't yet exist. A moment of irratio-nal, unexpected clarity. Inspiration moves like water, touching different parts of our soul and our mind, connecting them and taking them deeper and higher. Inspiration is not love, but it is a form of relationship: our inner self talking with the world, and the world answering back. Our potential finds a shape to grow into and takes the first steps in that direction. Before everything else, inspiration is a feeling. A feeling that can carry us, sometimes submerge us, even overwhelm us. It is a feeling we can only reach when we allow the world to envelop our being.”

-TBC-

find me on Twitter @rosekisspeach

[bronx-bomber87]

We march forward onto ep 8 for our series rewatch. :)

1x08 Time of death

This ep is a desert for gifs in general and Chenford content sadly.

Also a very Nolan forward ep. But lots of good Tim stuff too I wanted to review. That being said, had to use screen shots with my phone since this was a gif desert haha But none the less the review carries on ha

We start with Tim seeing Isabel being brought back to station cuffs and all.... Poor Tim. Always looks the saddest when Isabel is around. He asked Grey what is going on. Finds out she made a deal to be a CI Oof. His rough ride continues when it comes to her. The man can not catch a break. But her time with him is all about to come to head one way or another which he truly he needs.

We get our first (really our only) shot of our fav duo in their shop. Lucy commends Tim for letting the drugs be found. It's good she's reminding him what he decided was for the best. You can see he is still laden with heavy guilt over it. His internal loyalty still scolding him for not doing so. He defends Isabel and tells Lucy they weren't hers. I mean no...but she did willingly stash them for Carson my love.

He so desperate to have an explanation to this situation. To why she’s acting the way she is. He’s such a black and white guy. He needs this to make sense to him. To have something to hang this on. So he goes with her being taken advantage of. It’s what going to the narrative in his head for this. What his brain is able to wrap itself around. Lucy of course thinks that is BS and does what she does best. Calls him on it. Asking him if really believes that? Sadly we don’t get an answer due to Nolan’s officer involved shooting coming up. As the ep moves on we delve deeper into Isabel's CI SL. Tim finds out the plan from Talia and is none to pleased.

Tim comes into Capt. Anderson’s office like a bat out of hell. Ready to start throwing verbal punches. I love how the Capt immediately shuts him down before he continues. She’s like future Lucy puts him in check when he needs it. Something he responds to very well. He turns into sad puppy after she reprimands his abrupt entrance and lists off why Isabel is doing this OP.

When she is listing off those reasons he looks stressed. Tim wants so badly to control this situation. Yet he is at its mercy and its killing him. He’s so worried. He tells her the Isabel in her file is gone. The emotions brewing inside him and the look in his eyes. My damn heart. Eric doing what he does best. Killing me softly with his acting.

You see the empathy in Anderson's eyes after he says this. She softens a bit. Tells him at this point all she can give him is rescue detail. Only offer on the table for him. He accepts this but looks so resigned. Tim then apologizes for barging in and leaves much more defeated than when we walked in.

We get to see him next waiting in his car for the OP to start. Tim is causing self inflicted wounds, watching old videos on his phone of him and Isabel. Clearly long before this moment in time. Living in the past as long as he can before this op begins.

Angela interrupts this trip down memory lane by showing up in his car. (And bringing fries with her LOL) None the less she is ready to go into battle with him. To be there for him. You can see it on his face how much he appreciates this. He’s never one to ask but those important to him know he when he needs it. Her talking him through the op once it pops off is what he needs. I love Lopez. She’s the best. A true loyal friend through and through for Tim.

The op goes south pretty quickly after Isabel goes off book. They rush in to find Isabel’s wire and a trail of blood... Tim loses it on Wolfe and Vestri for letting this happen. Angela has to hold him back from going after them, his worst nightmare come to life in this moment. The one thing he always feared would happen. Ugh. This is where it ends for Tim at least. It’s a TBC with Nolan's SL still hanging in balance as well.

~~~

Side Notes-Non Chenford

Cold open is pretty funny with the escape room haha they’re all high fiving then Talia remember he’s a criminal LOL it’s such a serious episode they needed this levity up front.

Wolfe saying Isabel fallen off a long way since Tim( referring to Carson once they see him). She sure has….

Thank you all for your continued likes/ comments and reblogs. They mean more to me than you know. ❤️ Will try to get 1x09 next chance I get.

[kamyru]

Hey! The list of experiences you have had during your 3 years of med school are things that others wouldn't even think about occurring, and so the fact that you would be willing to delve into those topics through your writing, I think is really cool and I'm excited to see what you will write!

Could I request the third one on your list, about the sexual harassment from another employee with one of the characters of Romance MD: Always On Call?

Maybe Sen finding out his MC has been getting harassed by another doctor in the hospital, and that she hadn't told him, and how he would react/support her?

Hi, anon! Thank you for sending me this ask and telling me this. I was afraid that people would think that I seek attention. I'm happy to see that it wasn't the case. Medicine is hard, but I don't imagine doing anything else. I have always wanted to be into a profession that helps people. Yet, I think it's important to show the life from not its pinkest side. If anyone wants to send more requests regarding this, you can find the post in here (Turn my experience as a med student into fan-fiction ideas). I hope you'll like the result. ❤️

MC being sexually harassed by another doctor (Sentaro Kyogoku x MC) (Scenario)

Trigger warning: Sexual harassment

Author's note: The name Dr. Takahashi was chosen randomly.

Summary: Sentaro wanted to help MC enlarge her medical knowledge, however he had no idea where that would make to her.

Word counting: 1427

"Do you want to train under Dr. Takahashi?" Sentaro asked MC while in the EICU headquarters. He knew from the start what her reaction would be: big eyes full of enthusiasm, clapping hands, and unintelligible blabbering. When she finally got hold of herself, MC nodded and spiraled into continuous confirmations. "Butthead," Sentaro mumbled but didn't forget to pat her head.

Dr. Kyogoku hoped that MC's reaction was the same every time she woke up, understanding that she would spend another day with him. Okay, he knew that his girlfriend was at least half as animated in the mornings because of this, thankful she was a step away from reaching her dreams of saving lives and having the love of her life near her. MC would spend twenty-four hours with one of the leading doctors from the NICU, but Dr. Kyogoku was still the best in MC's eyes.

A curious and slightly jealous Sen met MC after her shift with homemade breakfast. However, instead of seeing an exalted MC who could barely shut her mouth, he met an absent-minded girl who didn't glance at the meat on the table.

"Was it a hard shift?" Sentaro asked while munching on something random from the table.

MC looked at him for a while and tried to smile. However, her lips contorted into a thin line that accentuated the bags under her eyes. She shook her head and walked to the bedroom she shared with her boyfriend. Dr. Kyogoku wanted to know more about her shift, her experience with Dr. Takahashi, the differences between them, and maybe some tips. Though, not after MC's sleep, nor any other day he got any information. All he could find was that it was normal and a little about the patients. Sen cared about the patients. It was his job. But he could read their reports. What he wanted to know was about the doctor. A furrow appeared between Sen's brows, a furrow that would grow only deeper.

The first time Sen had a hunch that something wasn't alright was the next day at the EICU headquarters when MC moved her chair a little further from Takado when he sat near her. The furrow spread to the orthopedist. Yet, everyone knew MC and her antics, so there was no reason to get worried, was it?

However, the furrow was more contagious than anyone could expect. Its next victim was Ekuni, whose entire couch got avoided by the once clumsy MC who tripped on him every other day. Poor Hosho had it even worse because his existence was entirely ignored.

The circle was complete when MC flinched under Kasumi's touch when his hand found its place on her shoulder during a meeting. That was when everyone understood that something had happened, and it wasn't just about MC's antics. So, Kasumi had to do something about this because MC was a part of his team, a dear friend, and Sen's most important person.

"Did you observe it?" the cardiologist asked Sen after a meeting in his office. The pediatrician didn't need an explanation to know what his boss was talking about. His shoulder fell, and he let out a long breath.

"Something happened. Why don't you try to cheer her up? Maybe a change of environment will help?"

Sen didn't know what to say but knew he had to do something. For the rest of the day, he tried small tricks on MC to cheer her up: ate ramen with her, used more of his voice, and spent most of the day in her company. However, nothing changed even when they found themselves in Sen's car. So, the boyfriend had to use the last resort.

"What do you think about another shift with Dr. Takahashi?" Sen tried, even if he hadn't talked his over with the doctor.

At these words, MC's eyes got bigger, and she tried to say something, but nothing coherent left her lips. All Sen could understand was his girlfriend's head shook. Something happened, and this had to do with Dr. Takahashi. On the next red light, the man put a hand on MC's thigh, in an attempt to calm her and encourage her to open up. However, she flinched even harder than when Kasumi touched her. She moved her leg, trying to escape from her boyfriend's touch. Sen apologized, then apologized again. Even if it was something normal to rest his hand on her thigh, he had to accept that it made her uncomfortable. He wanted to talk to her about this as soon as possible, but MC ran out of the car when he stopped and shut herself in the bathroom. After an hour, she left but chose to take the side of the bed nearer to the wall, pressing herself entirely on it and putting as much space between her and Sen as possible.

Sen couldn't let it slide. MC was his girlfriend and the most precious person in his life. If she couldn't talk about what had happened, he had to find out by himself. And the fastest route to do it was to go to the first clue - the person after whose interaction with MC had changed: Dr. Takahashi.

It wasn't as if Dr. Kyogoku and Dr. Takahashi were besties. They had a purely professional relationship where they were the happiest not to interact outside the hospital. However, they respected each other as doctors, which was the reason behind Sen's possibility to send MC to study under him. But he was ready to throw everything under the bus if it was for MC.

"I came here to ask you about my protege," Sen started with one of his signature smiles.

"MC? She is one of the best residents I have met in my entire career. You taught her well."

For a second, Dr. Kyogoku let a genuine smile reach his lips. He couldn't stop himself from feeling proud of MC. She was one of the best. However, he didn't have to forget why he was there.

"Did you have any emergencies then? Lost a patient?"

Dr. Takahashi shook his head. They had two operations during the day and then did check-ups. Sen was ready to leave and ask the nurses and the patients or even try to make MC talk. However, the second he stepped outside, he heard Dr. Takahashi mumbling: "Poor thing you are the one who took MC first. Fantastic body and soul."

And it clicked. The furrow between Dr. Kyogoku's brows grew the deepest, and the anger took control of him. With heavy steps, he approached his colleague and took him by the collar.

"What did you just say? What did you do?"

The older doctor tried to step back to escape Sen's fury. However, the grip on his collar was too strong.

"I did nothing wrong. I just listened to my desires. And don't tell me that you have never thought about touching that butt at least once."

Maybe Dr. Takahashi thought he did nothing wrong and was too sure of men's solidarity. But it didn't stop Sen from punching him in the face. In an attempt to save his butt, the offender took a heavy book from his desk, ready to avenge himself. Yet, Dr. Kyogoku was faster and made his opponent drop the improvised weapon. That weakened his defense, and a punch found its place on his lips. Thankfully, the nurses heard the noise and ran to stop the two doctors. Five minutes later, both of them were in the HR office.

MC had no idea what her boyfriend discussed with Dr. Takahashi and the HR department. What she knew was that she had to take care of Sen's wound as gently as possible.

"That's for the first time you touch me in days," Sentaro whispered.

MC let go of Sen's chin and looked at her feet. A tear fell down her cheek.

"You know what happened, don't you?"

"Broadly," Dr. Kyogoku nodded.

That made MC break. She covered her face with her hands, and fat tears fell on the ground.

"Can I touch you?" a heartbroken Sen asked, afraid to hurt MC even more. After he got her approval, he put his hands around her shivering body. "It's okay. I won't let anything like this happen again. It wasn't your fault."

MC's weak hand found its place against her boyfriend's chest. She couldn't talk just then. But she would. And even if she wouldn't, Sen was ready to be near her as long as she needed him and a little longer.

[purrincess-chat]

I heard you were comforting sad Adrinette shippers and I came as fast as I could.

honestly I'm so tired of the fandom drama. Once again had to block people because apparently Adrinette is boring and generic and then dating is destroying the love square development. Like I don't know how to say this but, Adrinette dating doesn't ruin the development, that is the development. Now people are saying that the love square has been destroyed. All from their not fav side getting together?

Hugs for all the tired Adrinette stans. People turned on them so quickly and for what?

You are so right, nonny. Adrinette dating is the development for the square. The dynamics changing was always bound to happen. That's how development works. What would be boring is if they stayed the exact same. People have been begging for something to happen between them for 4 seasons, and now when something has finally shifted and changed people are clinging to the old ways like "how dare the writers change them, they were perfect the way they were!!" Make it make sense, yall.

I'm still trying to see the boring part of Adrinette dating. Every episode I have watched this season has been so interesting and emotional, and it has made me fall in love with them all over again because they're so precious. And the show finally delving into their characters and addressing issues so they can come closer together and deepen their bond??? Hello??? That's so good??? And needed? Literally how is Adrinette becoming more comfortable with one another to a point where Marinette is confident around him instead of stammering and Adrien finally having someone he can lean on for support with his whole family situation bad for the love square? Literally how? The kids are finally getting the opportunity to love each other openly and be together. That's what we have all been waiting for since s1. Just because it wasn't a side some people wanted doesn't make it bad writing. The writing this season has been better than all of the past seasons. There is linear plot, character development that sticks, a deeper look into the villains motives, people making moves all over the place, foreshadowing. Literally everything we've asked for this whole time.

Some people just need to accept the fact that this is canon now, whether they like it or not. They can either live with it or move on. If the show no longer appeals to them because *checks notes* the flagship of the show got together, and there are "other shows that do high school romance way better" then perhaps they should go watch one of those shows instead. I've lost interest in shows before too, but rather than whining about it to people who still enjoy it, I just stopped watching. It's really that simple. And all of the hate and vitriol spewed at Adrinette and Adrinette stans for having the ✨audacity✨ to defend their enjoyment of canon and how this development makes sense with everything the show has given us up to this point is actively making the fandom worse. Like good god it's the same two people, arguing why it's unfair that Adrien and Marinette got together when it should have been Marinette and Adrien getting together is the stupidest shit. And actively shitting on people just for liking canon and making actual real people feel bad for enjoying a show about fictional teenagers just because it didn't turn out the way some people wanted? Shit behavior. Absolutely shameful.

Don't feel too bad about having to block people, nonny. Do what you have to for your peace in fandom. We can hang out here and have sleepovers and talk about how wonderful the love square being canon is while eating snacks and braiding each others hair. ❤

[theladyelara]

Could a tv show save the sequel trilogy?

After watching Clone Wars and Rebels and Clone Wars again and getting my heart absolutely wrecked every time, it brought me to two conclusions. One, Dave Filoni is a god and must be protected at all costs, and two, animated shows and tv shows in general have immense power 

So there’s a fair share of prequel hate out there, a camp which I sort of understand but definitely don’t belong to, but it’s pretty much universally accepted that the clone wars is golden. For a lot of people it made the prequel trilogy so much more meaningful and impactful than it was before. Rebels only continued this trend, continuing to give depth to the world of star wars, tying in some of the EU and continuing stories of tcw characters while also simply telling a really good story of a new cast. 

Which led me to the question I posed at the beginning. Could a tv show save the sequels? We’ve seen tcw ‘save’ the prequels, could a new show do the same for Disney? 

Disclaimer, I have not watched Resistance, and I have watched Mandalorian. 

In order to break down the question we’ll have to outline some things. First: Why did tcw ‘save’ the prequels. I think it comes down to these things. They... -- expanded upon and added depth to existing characters -- expanded the world building, and lore -- successfully introduced compelling new characters  -- continued the thematic elements of the prequels and sw as a whole  -- had really good storytelling overall  -- none of these above things contradicted or disconnected from the existing world of the movies

Now, is there a show that could do that for the sequels? Explore the characters more, delve deeper into the world, and tell a compelling and cohesive story? (listen I really am asking, lmk your opinion!) 

I am going, also, to posit some of the base ideas I have as well.

First: The year is before the Force Awakens, and after Ben genocides Luke’s temple. The show will center around one Jacen Syndulla and friends. Jacen is now a young Jedi who survived the temple razing, as he had been studying under Luke beforehand. Jacen is a quick tie in to the rest of the tv shows, being the child of Hera and Kanan from Rebels. He would travel the galaxy, perhaps trying to reach out to Ben, perhaps trying to stay the heck away from him. At some point he’ll find out about Something On Jakku and we’ll see him try to get there, always thwarted at exactly the wrong moment. Rey never meets him and it’s a tragedy. I could see him working with the resistance, and we could see other facets of the ST characters through him that way. The most potential I see with this idea is exploring Ben through a character like Jacen who grew up alongside him, and we could see more of exactly how Ben fell to the dark side, Snoke’s(and ig palpatine’s) influence and Luke’s teaching. It could also be used to salvage Luke as a character and give him better motivation for whatever happened in TLJ.  Of course, if you haven’t noted it already, we come to the stumbling block with this plot thread that FA made possible. It’d be almost exactly like Rebels. And I choose to blame this entirely on the New Hope Awakens episode 4 7 and not on my elevator pitch! 

Second: The other idea I had would be half about the sequel trilogy? It’d be more of a direct sequel to episode 6, basically following the OTs as they set up a new Jedi and a new Republic. But this may be bias talking, as that’s what I’d have wanted to see, and I also don’t know how well it’d work into the ST we actually got. The potential with this story thread again is Luke and Ben and Snoke, figuring out how Palpatine, one, survived, and two, has been pulling strings this whole time. The worldbuilding potential here is also huge, chances to explain what the first order is and why it exists.  However, I don’t know how well this would make for a tv show, and does little to help the characters of the ST, as it’d largely be set slightly before their time. 

Third: Somewhere between TLJ and ROS. This is the only time skip present between the mainline movies. It’s not like tcw, where the showrunners had something deliberate and fleshed out to talk about in their show. So they don’t have much low-hanging fruit to pick up for plot, and I think the time skip is pretty short. Still, this gives the most potential for the ST characters, and expounding upon them. We could see the trio actually work together, discover their relationships together as they go on missions. Rey is trying to learn how to be a Jedi, and is getting increasingly frustrated because she can’t get it. There could be darker hints as to her heritage. Also some proper bloody foreshadowing to the rise of palpatine and the Sith in the next movie. We should see her struggle and grow, go back to Jakku and deal with that, keep confronting Ben and Luke and Leia in more interesting ways. In my head the structure is pretty much like tcw or rebels, but maybe that’s just how I expect star wars shows to be structured at this point. A series of missions, exploring themes over arcs of a few episodes. And again we come to lovely originality problems, because this would be basically TCW with OT flavor and ST characters. But if it works it works, and I think this is really the best option to ‘save’ the ST. We need to get invested into these characters, and their best bet (as far as a tv show goes), is to do for Rey what TCW did for Anakin. 

[sonicunleash]

SONIC PRIME SPOILERS FOR SEASON 1 (THIS IS LONG. THIS IS LITERALLY ALL MY INITIAL THOUGHTS.)

OKAY SO FIRST OFF. GOD. Everything with new yoke is so so good. By far out of the universes they made new yoke a very very engaging one-- all the characters feel complex and thoughtful and it's not just a one-off universe. You care about their plight and while circumstances have changed them as people, theyre all still believable and complex like you can see why they've become this way. They dont feel like theyre being forcibly FIT into their roles in new yoke if that makes sense.

On that note, god Nine is so good and CARRIES when he has the focus. He's such a good introspective on Tails, and his deeper feelings and who he is without sonic, who he would be if he had to make it on his own. They do a wonderful balance of showing he's been forced to "grow up" because of the eggman empire, while also showing that he's still just.... a really lonely 8 year old who thinks the world is against him. So when sonic shows up and reaches out to HIM, gives him the first good connection he's had... he clings to it and clings hard. But he's new to connections and friends and doesn't really understand yet how to work them I think. So when sonic doesnt make it to save him, when sonic can't stay in the grim because he has other friends to save, nine takes it personally. It's all just. so so well done and in my opinion, out of all of the introspections they try to do with sonic's friends-- the most faithful, heartfelt, and engaging one. Which, is somewhat a given since it seems like Nine is going to remain a major, overarching character, along with the rest of new yoke.

ANYWAYS. Nine and New Yoke aside, I think another thing sonic prime is doing well so far is building up stakes with its main plot. Its not throwing nonsensical plots twists at you, but just builds in this great steady way that you're putting the pieces together on the situation the same time the characters are, and realizing just how deeply things are getting fucked. It's been REALLY engaging on that front and I'm happy for it.

But uhm. On a different note, the universes outside new yoke were.... lackluster. Both try to delve into another one of sonic's friends, and their feelings and sonic's relationship with them, but I think like... In the writers' heads right now, new yoke is the "main" plot heavy universe, and the others are one-off side universes that exist only as stepping stones to forward it. And you can... tell. Neither of the other universes' storylines are as engaging, and none of the alternates of the characters have the thought and depth that the new yoke ones have. And I think it kind of hurts the storyline, cause, well. You can tell. They WANT to engage you emotionally with amy and knuckles' nuances but they just fall flat and lose that impact theyre going for.

And god dont get me started on thorn and the jungle universe. That was just the biggest waste of what. 2? 3 episodes? I ever watched. I could not fucking care about that plot at all.

Uhm what else.... Well I think shadow is done... alright. He's being helpful, or, well, an ally (kinda hard to be helpful when youre a Void Ghost allowed only like 2 minutes of screentime), rather than a pointless obstacle, and his anger at sonic has reasoning behind it. His voiceacting also isn't as terrible as I thought. It's still not Right but its not kirk thornton-- and doesnt have that overexaggerated roughness. He is still very obviously sonic primes hype man though. He's got something going on, and clearly they want to do some kind of plot with him, but over the course of the 8 episodes he gets a little... repetitive. He kinda just relays the same thing to sonic every time we see him. Like Okay Sonic Fucked Up is Shadow going to just keep telling sonic that or is he gonna like. help.

I guess we'll see. I gotta be honest until that ball gets rolling im more invested in Nine and whatever happened there with Rusty Rose seeing Black Rose. someone please help rusty

[nesting-dreams]

I personally prefer it when Kevin is in charge of tmnt and not Peter. this is my personal opinions. You’re not wrong or right for agreeing or disagreeing with me. I’m not right or wrong either. It’s my thoughts. I have different tastes if you disagree with me. And that’s ok. Hopefully you can see where I’m coming from even if you disagree.

Peter’s too restrained. Boring.. constantly flip flops on ideas and instead of owning it he goes “might” instead of just yes or no. He tends yo strictly stay close to the mirage comics, but also ignores certain chapters that he dislikes for adaptations he’s involved in. Only knows his own characters at surface level and delves into them at a shallow depth. Mikey’s just the stoner to him and not really a character which is why Mikey’s always just existing whenever he’s in charge. Raph’s just this angry brute with nothing else going on. Stuff like that. (This is his responses in interviews and his work practice).

Kevin experiments but knows when too pull back if an ideas too out there even for the series. He actually says yes and no to things confidently. He’s the idea guy. Knows these characters at a deeper level and allows them to actually explore things beyond the stereotypes. (Interviews and his work practice).

Both say Mikey is the heart of the series, but Peter never shows proof of that. Kevin does. In the original mirage, Mikey’s not an idiot. Mikey’s not an idiot whenever Kevin is in charge. Mikey is always an idiot when Peter is in charge. I feel like based of this: Mirage mikey isn’t an idiot because of Kevin.

I feel like Kevin is the one you can give the most credit for with their original mirage series. Peter would of not gotten very far on his own without Kevin working with him.

(also side note: peter saying the turtles would never date anything. He helped Kevin write the romances in the mirage series. He doesn’t even remember his own source material for small details like that or he’s decided he finds it gross now, remembers and is a liar about that kind of thing would never happen).

(i only put this in one tag. Didn’t want to bring the mood down in all the different tmnt’s tags).

[music-addiction-disorder]

80s Hair Metal meets Gothic Rock in Sonja’s Video for “Nylon Nights”

The new single from Philadelphia gothic hair metal outfit Sonja, “Nylon Nights,” is a revenge tale for the ages.

It all started in 2017, when Texas black metal musician Melissa Moore came out as transgender to her Absu bandmates and was promptly fired via text message. The betrayal, hurt, and subsequent shunning rocked her to the core. Drummer Grzesiek Czapla and bassist Ben Brand joined forces with her to form her new band Sonja.

Sounding like a heady mix of goth rock and 80s hair metal bands, Sonja blasts powerful hooks that would be right at home opening for the likes of NWOBHM stalwarts, Mötley Crüe, The Cult, and Sisters of Mercy alike, culminating in their first full-length (and Cruz Del Sur Music debut), Loud Arriver. Loud Arriver is Moore’s first full-length album in a decade, marking her debut as lead vocalist. (POST-PUNK.COM)

SONJA

Loud Arriver (2022)

Cruz Del Sur Music

Philedelphia / Pennsylvania / U.S.A. 🇺🇲

ALBUM OF THE YEAR... PERIOD!!!

1. When The Candle Burns Low... 05:28

2. Nylon Nights 04:34

3. Pink Fog 04:18

4. Wanting Me Dead 05:59

5. Fuck, Then Die 04:55

6. Daughter Of The Morning Star 04:03

7. Moans From The Chapel 02:57

8. Loud Arriver 05:39

It is a catharsis: much of the music Melissa Moore wrote during the Absu debacle is now lost due to the adversity surrounding her gender; the pandemic further delayed production. But Sonja forged ahead, creating big, anthemic songs.

As Moore notes on the origin of the band:

“We actually started in 2014 and were active under the radar while Absu still existed. When Absu collapsed in 2017, Sonja went into full focus, and I was a shattered person. Its output couldn’t be rushed because the stakes were so high now.”

On songwriting for Sonja’s debut album, she adds:

“Interestingly, the lyrics were written in a time of fear and darkness for me. Right up until the moment I sang them in the studio. I was existing in a numb void. I really had to acknowledge that I was cut off from the light. I can only delve deeper or wait in place for nothing. The performance of these songs demands a power that only came to me recently, and I descend into my surroundings more intentionally now.

The video for the lead single ‘Nylon Nighs”, directed and edited by Geneva Jacuzzi collaborator Zev Deans, depicts a sex worker who seeks revenge on a betrayal from a John. It’s a metaphor for oh, so much – yet the emotionally charged video ultimately shows her getting the upper hand, so to speak.

On working on the video, Zev Deans comments:

“It is not often that I see this deeply eye-to-eye with a collaborator. I’ve done a great deal of surreal and fantastical work with bands that want to keep things on the lighter side of the spectrum. I rarely get to tell a story that is this personal, especially a story that is so grounded in reality in terms of set and setting. Sonja presented a challenge that I was all too excited to meet.”

(POST-PUNK.COM)

Loud Arriver was recorded in 2019 at Creep Recording Studio in Philadelphia with Dan Kishbaugh. Its vocals were tracked with acclaimed producer Arthur Rizk (Cavalera Conspiracy, Enforced, Kreator). (POST-PUNK.COM)

Ben Brand - Bass / Backing Vocals

Melissa Moore - Guitar / Vocals

Grzesiek Czapla - Drums

At the first hint of dusk a primal terror awakens inside me

Ruinous desire swirling in the air

Unpredictable strangers on the hunt to fulfill their darkest fantasies

I know they're all coming for me again tonight

A pack of wolves coming to devour

And they might get me this time...

But I'll take a piece of every one of their souls as payment

@beardedguy1369 @wolfofodin-scotland-edinburgh @boundandbimba @gloria-glitter @x-heesy @goblinkleaver @maidenintexas1 @bonedaddy-13 @moonstar-magic @twinqlinglights ...

[merakiui]

I was reading through your tags and you mentioned at some point the kazuscara roommates finding your onlyfans and I think I completely combusted—thus i present to you my brain rot of late: you attend the same school as them but you’re not actually friends, all you know about kazuha is that he’s the friendly regular at the cafe you work at, who makes polite conversation every now and then but otherwise is nothing of note. In reality he’s been stalking you for weeks ever since your first encounter, and is dead set on the idea that you’re this innocent, weak thing that needs to be protected (maybe he stepped in when you had a bad customer and your meek reply helped fester his delusions?). Scara, on the other hand, is only aware of your presence since you’re his favourite cam model that he recently found. (Since he’s a harbinger he’s probs loaded) Weeks of funnelling money towards you cause him to feel this unwarranted possessiveness, believing that since he’s been providing so much in your “relationship” that it’s time you reward him in turn. However, despite the unbridled interest they have toward you neither are aware of each other’s feelings for you— that is, until you happen to run into the both of them heading to your class. While both are known for maintaining their stoic masks, they’re friends for a reason— and instantly can tell the attraction their roommates have towards their own “lover”. After kazuha finds your onlyfans he’s certain that you’ve been coerced and wants to save you, while scara thinks it’s time that he’s stopped letting other plebeians look at his possession—so, despite their initial reservations, come together to form the ideal plan. When you find yourself waking up groggy in a room you don’t recognize, all they can do is look on with glee whilst planning their next course of action with their new belonging. They’re friends after all, and good friends share though, don’t they?

This is v long srry lol you can ignore this ofc!!

AAAH, ANON!! YES!!! <3 I couldn’t resist writing more on this concept. orz They make for such a terrifying pair when they work together!

(cw: yandere, stalking, nsfw, implied kidnapping/drugging, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, delusional thoughts, savior complex, implied violence)

What if Kazuha and Scara were just acquainted with one another and actually became closer through their mutual obsession with you? Yes, they’re roommates and ought to get along because they’re living together but they haven’t exactly clicked yet. They talk every now and then and know little things about each other. Nothing too special. They don’t really hang out outside of their dorm either, what with their class schedules being vastly different. And Kazuha’s always out of the dorm doing who-knows-what. Most of his time is spent at a café, where he’ll write and read and stare at you while you work. On the other hand, Scara prefers to stay inside if he doesn’t have a good reason to go out. He likes his alone time. Although he has enjoyed going to the library every now and then to study.

So maybe they need to find some common ground. Maybe they need a push in the right direction before they get closer.

Kazuha likes to stare. Talking to you is great, but he worries he’ll say too much and then he’ll be a nuisance, or you might not want to talk to him at all since you’re working. But you always regard him with a warm smile, happy to scribble his name on the plastic cup because you remember him. Because you recognize his familiar face and soft, gentle eyes. He’s the one who saved you from that rude customer, after all, and he’s a polite regular. Why wouldn’t you know him? You might look like you can handle those types of situations, but what Kazuha saw that day was something entirely different. You were nervous—so soft-spoken and scared. He absolutely has to protect you from those kinds of people now, doesn’t he?

And he does exactly that. He’s your second pair of eyes—your valiant knight in shining armor—who sees and hears all. Sometimes he goes to the café with the intention to simply watch over you and make sure no one’s bothering you. He can recall one time when a customer was speaking rudely about you because her drink hadn’t been prepared in a ‘timely manner.’ In reality it’s impossible to make a drink within a few seconds, especially when you’re already preoccupied with making another customer’s drink. She must’ve woken up on the wrong side of the bed, or maybe she’s just a hateful person in general. You didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of such fiery insults, though.

Her eyes just can’t see your perfection and therefore she does not deserve to see out of them.

Kazuha’s willing to wrestle with all of this darkness if it means you’ll stay safe, oblivious, and pure. You’re like a defenseless kitten, unable to protect yourself from the scary world. He writes about you a lot in his journal; you’re his muse—someone who constantly shows up in poems and short paragraphs where he tries to describe what your dream date might be or what type of wedding you’d prefer. Things get darker the deeper you delve into his writings, where you’ll find entries in great detail. Kazuha writes a lot and he doesn’t even mean to. He just has to get all of his thoughts on paper before they abandon him and he’s left with emptiness.

Everything you do is pure; you’re almost an equivalent to a holy being. Your smell is pure. Your body is pure. Your actions are pure. Your smile is pure. Even when you’re on the verge of crying from harsh customers or when you’re turning down a confession, you’re still pure. And Kazuha likes that about you because it’s special. There aren’t many people in his life who are completely pure. He’s been through a lot of rough things and has seen firsthand how impure people can be. It’s only fair that he gets a chance to protect purity itself.

He might have some impurities, but that doesn’t deter him from watching over you. As gentle and unassuming as he is, there are times when even he loses his composure. Not many are privy to these dark emotions of his. His smiles are sharp and venomous and his eyes fill with a gloom so dark it can swallow you whole. You’ll never see this side of him; he won’t allow it. Instead you’re treated to his sweet, calm side, where he feigns perfection in hopes of catching your interest.

As for Scara… He doesn’t really care about Kazuha in the beginning. He’s just someone he has to live with. It’s not a big deal and as long as he doesn’t try to make lots of pointless conversation everything will be okay. He prefers the peace and quiet, considering he’s acquainted with people who are far from peaceful and quiet. Scara’s relieved that Kazuha leaves the dorm so often because it gives him an opportunity to watch his favorite cam star’s most recent video. He’s your most loyal follower—someone who’s paid lots of money just to have access to the highest tier of rewards and such. He even got a private video where you addressed him and moaned out his name with lustful thoughts of him. Having lots of money comes in handy.

When he finds out that you go to the same school as him, he’s a little shocked. He didn’t expect you to be so close. You’re practically within touching distance. If only he knew your schedule. If only you were in one of his classes. It’s really annoying that he only knows your online presence and not who you might be in your personal life. The last thing he’s going to do is consult Childe, that popular athlete who knows literally everyone in the school for whatever reason. Surely he knows you. But he’ll die before he ever asks Childe for a favor.

Scara loves you out of every other cam model because you’re different. You’re not just trying to get fast cash. You’re genuine. You listen to your subscribers and their feedback. You do your best to improve and do even better streams than the previous ones. All of your hard work is overlooked by the other fools who watch your streams, but it isn’t overlooked by him. Scara appreciates your attention to detail and the way you’re able to hook him with your breathless voice alone. You’re very skilled at what you do, so it’s only fair you get paid for it.

But buying your services isn’t enough. It’s not a real relationship, but it certainly feels like it when he buys preferential treatment. Private shows, special requests, odd favors—you do it all because he pays for it. But this relationship isn’t going to be one-sided forever. You’ll have to pay him back in full eventually. Scara likes to think he has patience and that waiting is fine. It gives him more time to plan his next move—to figure out what he should do to finally have you all to himself. So that those private shows he watches through a screen can finally be real.

Scara finds the journal sitting innocently on Kazuha’s bed, its maroon cover and maple leaves pulling at his curiosity. He might not know everything about Kazuha, but he’d recognize this journal anywhere. His roommate almost always has it on his person. Scara wouldn’t be surprised if he slept with it. To say he’s curious would be absolutely correct. He can only wonder what Kazuha writes in that thing. Perhaps it’s just notes for a class. That’s what anyone would think, right?

Scara opens it and flips through the first few pages. They’re normal for the most part. Just a bunch of haikus and other useless scribbles. When he skips over some pages, he starts to find things that are far more interesting than poetry and doodles of cats. He finds the majority of the journal is comprised of information. More specifically, there are facts and other knowledge about you—the cam model he’s been obsessed with ever since he stumbled upon your onlyfans. He reads through as much of the journal as he can and instantly learns so much: your address, your roommate, your workplace, your friends’ names, names of any potential exes. The list goes on and on.

Scara doesn’t have anything against Kazuha. His first impression of him wasn’t anything groundbreaking. He thought he was a pushover at first. But now that he knows what this journal holds… Well, it sheds an entirely new light on his roommate.

Just days before Scara took a peek inside his journal, Kazuha discovers your secret online life. He snoops through Scara’s laptop when he steps out, having left it open and unlocked. He’s just trying to find what could have caught Scara’s interest, as he’s almost always glued to his laptop on specific days at specific times, with his headphones on and his gaze unyielding. He doesn’t intend to find the file of one of your private videos—something that was meant only for Scara’s eyes.

He clicks on the video out of interest. He’s not sure what he was expecting to see, but it definitely wasn’t this. Kazuha sits there and stares at the sight before him. You’re dressed in skimpy lingerie and you’re muttering the dirtiest things while coating your fingers in lube. And your hands are stroking a thick toy and you’re addressing Scara and you’re lining it up to your hole and— He shuts the laptop before it can get even more explicit than it already is. He’s so conflicted, fraught with a betrayal so strong it weighs his heart down.

Why would he have this sort of video on his laptop? Did you give it to him? Did he make you do this? Are you in danger? Are you still pure?

Kazuha can’t kill on campus. It’s way too risky and he’d be one of the first suspects if Scara’s body is found. Besides, it’s not like he has the full story. He doesn’t know whether or not Scara’s done something that’s worthy of death. You could just be in a tight spot. He knows how easily you give in when you’re under pressure. Maybe you’re just doing this because you feel like it’s the only thing you can do. Not to worry; Kazuha will save you before Scara can ruin your purity with his twisted fantasies.

They confront each other when the time feels right. Kazuha struggles to keep a smile plastered to his face for the sake of politeness, while Scara holds in his raging temper so that he can bear some semblance of cooperation. Neither of them is happy to hear that the other went through their stuff, but they force themselves to make up because a more pressing issue is at hand: their connection to you.

Kazuha says he’s your secret admirer. Scara says he’s in a relationship with you. There’s no way you’d ever date someone like Scara—Kazuha knows this for a fact. Yet he falters at the confidence in Scara’s tone. That can’t be the truth, right? Despite this, Kazuha still strikes up an offer: If they work together to get what they both want, they’ll be unstoppable. With Scara’s riches and his influence and Kazuha’s charisma and clever thinking, they can easily get their hands on you. Of course this means they’ll have to share, but it’s not a big deal when they’re already in so deep. They both know the other’s secret; now they’re swearing to keep it in the pursuit of having you all to themselves. And luckily Scara agrees to the deal, but that doesn’t give Kazuha a reason to lower his guard.

However despite how well they work together when it comes to planning the kidnapping and actually executing it, they both have their own reasons for wanting you. Scara wishes to make his relationship with you a reality—to toss aside the screen that once held him back and finally do all of the things he could only do in his dreams. Kazuha seeks to protect your fragile heart, lest you crumble under Scara’s intense way of doing things and cling to him for salvation. You can’t do those sorts of things with Scara; he won’t allow it. Your purity is meant for him and no one else.

But sharing is caring and some have to learn that the hard way. It definitely brings Kazuha and Scara closer together, even if neither of them will admit it. If they look past their desires, they can be friends. And soon enough they’ll have to accept this new friendship if they want to avoid any unnecessary complications.

However there are times when they’ll cooperate in order to do things with you. They’re a packaged deal you can’t get rid of.

[brandyllyn]

To sell your love for peace (01)

Javier Peña x f!reader [no use of y/n]

Summary: You weren’t his type but he was willing to make an exception.  Words: 2500

Other Chapters My Masterlist 

Rated: Hella Explicit.

Warnings: language. fingering. PiV. prostitution. Javier is a normal amount of asshole.

You were pretty. That was the first thing Javier noticed after you threw open your apartment door. Not the brittle beauty of the girls that he usually preferred, but a basic almost wholesome kind of pretty that he knew a lot of men paid good money for. Javier stepped inside, carefully scanning the street behind him and then guiding you back into your apartment with one hand on the base of your spine. He closed the door behind him, being sure to lock it.

You introduced yourself and he nodded. "Javi," he offered, holding a hand out and taking note of the calluses on your fingertips when you took it. He scanned the small living room, taking in the quilt hung on the wall and the small painting of flowers near the kitchen.

"Can I get you a drink?" You asked, hands nervously running down your thighs. He nodded and you disappeared into the kitchen, the skirt of your dress skimming across your thighs. He took in your assets almost dispassionately. You had a cute, girl-next-door vibe. Someone a man could pretend to be in love with for the night.

You probably had more work than you knew what to do with.

The whiskey bottle you held up was exactly what he was hoping for and he nodded at your questioning look. You met him in the living room with two glasses, walking around the threadbare couch and settling onto one end. He sank into the other, shrugging his jacket off.

"Vanessa says you know each other-"

"From work," you finished for him, glancing at him from the corner of your eye before looking away. He was used to this. A lot of men were harsh with the girls, and as a result there could be a hesitancy in women in your profession around unknown strangers. It was important that he made himself as non-threatening as possible.

"From work," he echoed, taking a drink from his glass but not probing on that subject further. "How long have you lived here?"

Glancing around the apartment you shrugged, "A few months? I moved her from Medellín last fall."

Javier made a note of that, sipping his whiskey. "The place is nice, I like the quilt."

You smiled, finally, seeming to relax a bit. "My grandmother made it."

He smiled back, "I have a blanket my great-grandmother crocheted. Ugliest thing you’ll ever see. Old bat was colorblind." You gasped and choked on the whiskey and his grin grew wider. "You okay?"

"Yes," you croaked, holding a hand to your throat. "Just, went down the wrong way." Your eyes met his from under long eyelashes. "My grandmother would murder me if she heard me talking about her like that."

"Mine’s already passed," he shrugged. "I’m not worried."

"I’m sorry." You reached out and touched his knee and then jerked your hand back. He clocked that as well.

The whiskey was good, not expensive by any stretch but not cheap shit either. He watched as you fidgeted with the hem of your skirt, glass in one hand. Finally you said, "Vanessa says you’re… that you can pay. For… information."

This was what he had been waiting for. He leaned forward, dropping his glass to the table and turning his body towards yours. "That depends on the information."

You swallowed and nodded to yourself. "I know some… I heard something. About…"

He knew this dance as well. Knew why you were hesitating. "If you help me I promise to do everything I can to keep you safe."

You nodded again, still not looking at him. "If I knew something about Escobar. And his plans. That would be worth something?"

"If it turns out to be true," Javier raised an eyebrow. "If it helps us, then yeah. It’s worth something."

You nodded, silently staring into your glass.

"Do you know something?" he asked, watching your face. You stared into the distance before the words tumbled out.

"There’s a hit. On Friday. The Minister of Finance."

Javier blinked. He knew that. Six weeks of surveillance by the CIA hoping to find a connection for their own purpose had dropped the nugget of information to the DEA. It had taken a lot of wrangling and horse-trading to get the info, and even now he could admit it was more dumb luck than skill that had gotten them the notice.

Dumb luck, skill, and now you dropping it in his lap.

"How do you know that?" He asked and his eyes narrowed when you shook your head at him.

"I can’t- please don’t ask me that."

Also not uncommon. If the relationship continued he’d get it out of you eventually. Reaching into his pocket he pulled out a pack of smokes, giving you a questioning look and offering one to you. He lit it after you gave permission, letting it dangle from his fingers as he watched you.

"How do I know this is good intel?"

You sighed, setting your glass down on the coffee table. "The man, the one who is going to do the hit, his name is Jackal."

Javier sat bolt upright, dropping his cigarette across his empty glass. That was a name he’d only heard a few times. A sicario that had thus far evaded any attempt to get a photo. "How the fuck do you know that name?"

Again you shook your head. "I asked you not to ask me that."

He bit off his retort. If you had a lead on Jackal, even if it was only hearing about him in passing, then he needed you to keep offering him intel. Needed you to trust him and tell him how you knew this. He pulled his wallet out with a grunt, opening it and thumbing through the contents. Javier looked at you through the cigarette smoke as he dropped a twenty onto the table.

"Until I can confirm," he paused and looked you over. You weren’t really his type. He liked his girls primped and preened, long nails and perfect makeup. But then again, there was something about the smooth skin that your dress showed, the curve of your thigh, the way he could see your nipples pebbled against the fabric. You weren’t his type but he was willing to make an exception. Slowly raising an eyebrow, he held your eye as he counted out another sixty bucks. "Yes?"

You nodded, licking your lips, the action making his cock stir. He added another twenty onto the pile, making it an even hundred, before folding the remaining cash and shoving it back into his jacket. "Drink up," he motioned at your glass, picking his cigarette up and taking a puff.

"You’re beautiful," he said conversationally and you choked again. His brow furrowed. It was just something to move the night along. To get out of the idea of you being an 'informant' and back into your day - well night - job. The girls usually liked it when he complimented them, winking at him and offering to show him all of their beautiful parts. But you seemed flustered and your chest heaved.

It was an amazing act.  

"Can I kiss you?" A standard question. Every girl had a different standard for what they were willing to do - the intimacy they were comfortable with. Judging from your look and demeanor - your schtick was 'hometown sweetheart'. Javier was pretty sure the answer would be yes.

Sure enough you nodded and he carefully set his cigarette to the side, shuffling across the couch and cupping his hand behind your neck. Pulling you closer to him and gently pressing his mouth to yours. Your lips parted on a gasp and he took advantage of it, thrusting his tongue deep and licking inside of you.

You smelled sweet. Tasted it too. He was used to women who tasted like cigarettes, maybe alcohol - just like he was sure he did. But you tasted like sugar and he delved his tongue deeper into your mouth to chase it. He wondered, idly, if you would taste as sweet all over. If maybe tonight would be the night to break his general distaste on going down on a hooker. He always thought, in the back of his mind, that he would end up with a mouthful of someone else’s cum if he did.

He didn’t begrudge you your profession, but there were some aspects of it that frankly didn’t interest him.

You moaned softly and he wrapped his arms tighter around you, guiding you backwards until you spilled down onto the couch. He slipped his hand under your shirt to palm at your breast, your back arching up to him with a small gasp. Oh, he liked that. The air of inexperience rather than the usual carefully orchestrated arches and moans. He thrust his tongue into your mouth, finding your nipple with sure movements and rolling it between his fingers.

You cried out, your hands tugging at the strands of his hair and your thighs parting so he could settle more firmly between them. His lips ghosted down your neck, digging his teeth into the soft flesh and you trembled. You fucking trembled and Javier made a mental note that he had gotten a deal with the hundred he had dropped for you.

His hands pulled at your clothes and you dropped your own to help, pushing the top of your dress down. Reaching behind his neck he pulled his shirt over his head, not bothering with the buttons, and then leaned down and pressed his chest to your bare skin.

"Fuck you feel good," he groaned into your mouth, tongue darting out to taste you once again. Your fingers skimmed down his spine, slipping beneath the band of his jeans and then rising back up. He wanted your hands on him and he reached behind himself to catch one of your wrists, dragging it between your bodies and pushing it beneath the denim. Your touch was soft at first, hesitant, but a thrust of his hips pinned your fingers between his cock and your stomach and he could rock himself into your palm.

It took very little adjustment to press his mouth to your breast, to pull your nipple into his mouth and tug. Your hand clenched around his cock and you let out a soft whine that sounded almost like his name. He grinned, moving to your other breast, rubbing his cheek to your soft flesh.

"You smell like cookies," he groaned, licking underneath your breast and then up to your neck. "Fuck, how do you smell like fucking cookies?"

"It’s vanilla," you gasped and he pressed his nose to your neck, inhaling the soft scent. It reminded him of home, of lazy weekend mornings and a domesticity he had left behind in Laredo. Powdered sugar on almond dough and canned preserves pulled out for Sunday breakfast.

Fuck he definitely hadn’t paid you enough.

He shifted his weight on the couch, reaching down to stroke up your thigh. He felt you shiver and then his fingers met soft cotton. Soft, damp, cotton.

"Oh sweetheart," he pressed his lips to your cheek, pushing the fabric aside and running his hand through your slick heat. "You’re so wet. For me?"

You didn’t answer but your thighs parted further and his thumb slipped over your clit. He heard you gasp, pulled back to see you bite your lip and arch your neck.

"Can you come for me pretty thing? Come on my fingers before I fuck you?"

The hand that was in his pants shifted, fingers wrapping around his cock more fully and he dropped his forehead to your shoulder and matched your movements, slipping two fingers inside of you. Felt you squeeze around him even as your hand tightened and slid across his cock. If he wasn’t careful he was going to come in his jeans like a fucking teenager.

He sat back on his heels, using his free hand to pull your hand out of his pants. With a careless twist of his wrist he flipped your skirt back and tugged your panties to the side. "Oh that’s a pretty little pussy," he growled, "you think you can take three?" He didn’t wait for a reply, pulling your hips up so they rested on his thighs and then slipping three fingers deep inside you. You reached over your head with both arms, twisting your hands into the pillow under your head. The action lifted your breasts up higher and Javier wished he had a third hand so he could pinch your nipples while he played with you.

Three fingers in your cunt, two fingers of his other hand rubbing across your clit. He could fucking hear how wet you were for him, felt your muscles clench around him, your knees rising further to his sides. "Yeah, fuck baby that’s it."

He wouldn’t say you screamed when you came. The sound was lower than that, more of a helpless cry than anything else. Your mouth opened in a perfect 'O' - a shape made to take his cock. Maybe next time. Right now, he wanted to be inside of you.

His jacket was on the floor and he retrieved a condom while you were still recovering, slipping it on and giving himself a couple of short tugs. Leaning forward and propping one hand on the pillow next to your head, he pushed your panties to the side. Lining himself up and slowly sliding inside of you.

You had been tight on his fingers, on his cock you fit like a fucking glove. He pressed all the way, watching your face as you took every inch of him. The way your forehead crinkled and you bit your lip. Then your eyelashes fluttered open and you met his eyes.

Fuck, you smiled at him.

He fell across you, thrusting his tongue into your mouth and taking you hard and fast. He could feel your nails raking down his back, your legs lifting to wrap around his hips. He wanted to make you come again, wanted to feel you shudder and moan beneath him.

But your hands came up to cup his face and you moaned "Javi" directly into his mouth and he fucking came. Body hunching over yours as he cursed and grunted, fucking hard into you and then dropping his forehead to yours.

"Fuck I’m sorry," he mumbled, kissing you softly.

"For what?"

He groaned and pulled out of you, leaning back to the other side of the couch and stroking his hand along your calf. "I’m not usually such a fucking two-pump chump."

You pulled a blanket from the back of the couch, tucking it under your arms and covering your legs before sitting up and placing your hand over his. "Maybe… maybe we try again?"

Javier leaned his head back and shut his eyes. How the fuck did that make him feel worse? "No, I have to go. There’s something I gotta… anyway. I can’t stay."

"Oh."

He turned and looked at you, reaching out and chucking you lightly under the chin. "Maybe next time?"

Your smile was bright enough to light up the fucking city. For just a moment Javier felt like he was the only man in Bogatá.

God damn you were good at this.

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Pt 2

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Taglist:

@hnt-escape, @kesskirata , @supernaturalgirl , @notabotiswear , @wonderlandgabby , @pascalesque

[darktangledwhispers]

There is collected horrors upon me. (Kurapika X Reader) N-S-F-W

𝕿𝖂: 𝕮𝖔𝖓𝖙𝖆𝖎𝖓𝖘 𝖒𝖊𝖓𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓𝖘 𝖔𝖋 𝖘𝖊𝖑𝖋-𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖒, 𝖇𝖑𝖔𝖔𝖉....

I am randomly here now. Don't mind. Just read why don't you?

☂ Collecting your thoughts, racing through your head, you hated this horrid nightmare that kept replaying over and over. He always managed to be one step ahead of you, in everything. His color-changing eyes delved with the witness of torture beyond no imagination, blonde and never-ending soft hair that practically glided through his fingers every time he was stressed. That's what lured you in and now he is right there. In your reach. But managing to look so far away. The pain in his eyes was like no other. How could you manage to fall for someone that's barely there in their own mind?

He looked up at you, his attention not set on the wet cement anymore, but on your apprehensive figure. His lips were parted, you seemed to be staring at them for too long because once he spoke, the movement had startled you.

"Did I interest you that much?" His slick voice escapes his mouth, sounding deeper than before. "I was worried you would stop following me." He stood up, managing to almost tower over you.

You scoffed, feigning disinterest before turning your head back to him. "Why would I ever stop? You're my only lead." You look at him with desperation almost, hoping he won't run this time. Although that was a silly thought. He rarely stayed long enough for you to collect yourself. He always left you breathless. The scent of him caught in your throat as he leaned forward, his eyes flickered down to your lips before looking back up. Kurapika had never once smelt anything around bad. He always smelled like the fresh crisp smell of honey drizzled all over redwood, a sweet but harsh scent, it always made you picture a beautiful forest that had the best dark secrets.

"Why haven't you tried to make me tell you anything yet then?" You didn't expect to hear those words come from him. It left you a little shocked. How hasn't he disappeared yet? It used to be so easy for him too. Now he hit the nail on the head... And so unexpected.

"Why haven't you told me anything if you knew?" You managed to come back with a witty response, a raindrop hitting your nose but you never let your gaze move away from him, afraid that if you even blinked, he would be gone. A smile appeared on his face, only for a split second before he went back to his usual deadpan expression. It tugged at your heartstrings, your knees feeling a little heavier than usual.

"You're right. But what if I liked seeing your skill (F/N)?" Once your name left his lips a shiver ran down your spine.

"How do you know my name?" Your voice wavered now, a little frightened at how he managed to find out. It would've taken a lot for someone to find your name, if not years. You barely told anyone your name.

More raindrops found their way onto your burgundy coat and on Kurapika's reddish-pink nose. It looked like he was really cold from the flush on his cheeks. He looked down, not giving an answer.

Thinking that he would escape now, you sighed and your shoulders dejected, looking at the grey bricked sidewalk. You turned. "You've seen my skill enough then. We weren't supposed to get close like this. I have an objective. So do you." Before you knew it, cold harsh words left your lips. Kurapika's eyes showed a tinge of discomfort to them, the curiosity leaving and replaced with what could only be described as worry. His newfound interest, leaving him? Oh, that wasn't a good thought at all for him. But you didn't know your effect. You thought it was just your silly mind... Playing tricks...

Your dark cerulean boots hit the scattered puddles on the ground, leaving the traumatized blonde on his own, his mouth agape slightly. Was he the one being left behind now? No. That couldn't happen. That wasn't happening. He tensed up as he chased after your disappearing figure, a new feeling taking over him, desperation.

His black dress pants were getting wet on the edges and his shoes becoming littered with water droplets. Your confused (E/C) eyes entered his sight as soon as he came to a halt, only three feet away from you. The boy was confused, it was jumbled all onto his face. Why was he following you? He did have one objective. He needed to focus but you were the only thing on his mind lately. That's why he led you here... Right?

"You can't leave. I haven't said-"

"Yet you can when it's me the one talking." You interrupted him, a glare sent his way. He looked down and then back up, his breathing rigid, his brown eyes flickering to a scarlet which made you stop everything altogether.

"I was afraid." The truth practically dripped from his lips from that moment. His eyes showed all the vulnerability. Why was he opening up to you like this now? Why is he trying to mess with you? You gritted your teeth, shaking your head. "Please leave."

"Why?" He asked, stepping closer to you, realizing he's managing to get through to you. He knew it was wrong to slowly force you to open yourself to the idea of letting him talk but he needed to speak his mind. You were giving in to his little trap.

"You're making a mistake Kurapika. You're making me make a mistake." You shook your head and backed away, trying your best to understand what he needed to say so badly but there were no clues. "You're giving me the wrong idea..." You muttered, your heavy breathing could be seen in the cold air, letting off a fog.

He slowly walked to you until he was only a couple centimeters apart, his scarlet eyes staring deep into yours. You were getting lost in them, your breath hitching. His face... So close... It reminded you of when you first saw him, standing on the rooftop, peering down at the auction house. It was only until later on, you had realized that he had become the Mafia leader. You knew then he could help you but you didn't realize that he was going to try to help in multiple ways. Especially like this.

"Who told you it was the wrong idea?" He had no idea what he was saying, he just followed what his heartbeat was telling him and it was pointing to you in over a million different ways and languages in his head. His lips were slowly coming closer to yours, the rain had picked up but both of you were too distracted to notice. His nose touched yours, the excitement erupted in your stomach as the Kurta pushed you against a wall of one of the buildings. Good thing he picked this time... The city had no one wandering around at this time.

"Back away Kurapika..." Your voice gave it all away, how unsure you were, how much you wanted this boy's lips on yours. It expressed everything to Kurapika at that moment and he took it as a sign to move forward, his lips crashing onto yours.

They were soft, the slight taste of liquor was on them but not enough to cringe at. You made a note of that. 'Guess he likes to indulge in his own regrets...' You gripped onto the lapels of his suit, a groan muttering out his mouth and into yours. You could feel the wetness of his hair against you from the rain, the raindrops mixing in with the kiss before you pulled away. There was a relief of some tension as you looked into his eyes. But they were still burning red.

It was obvious. He didn't just want one simple kiss...

He wanted more.

Everything from then on was a blur, from the trip to his place, to how your clothes slowly littered his marble living room floor, to where you were getting observed by him... Underneath him... His intense gaze never left you, every little inch he observed of your skin, littering kisses, a little lovebite. You'll never get the feeling of his teeth lightly grazing and latching onto your skin ever out of your mind. Never. He was intoxicating. Everything about him was intoxicating you.

"Keep looking at me like that... So I can keep it in my head forever..." He whispers, his lips pressing against your neck now as his hands explore the sides of your body. Rough and still soft... It made you shiver as you looked at the white ceiling. His bed was huge and it made you wonder how he even slept in it lonely but that thought quickly got suppressed in your mind as he found your sweet spot. A moan left your lips unexpectedly, his grip tightening on the bedsheets once he heard what he'd been waiting for. He continued to abuse that spot, his teeth pressing in now, the taste of your skin messing him up slowly. You groaned.

He stopped once he knew left quite the mark on you, his kisses becoming rougher and his hands clearly impatient as they started to travel more. Sounds kept slipping out of you, driving him to slowly lose it. He couldn't take it anymore.

He gripped onto your wrists tightly, marks were going to be on them later, a foreign feeling pushing into you and before you know it you were screaming because of him. He changed his rhythm every time he knew you got comfortable, his own expression twisted in pleasure. There was a little blood surrounding his mouth. You knew he didn't mean to... He couldn't help it.... He just used his canines too much... And you didn't care.

"Kurapika..." You muttered against his collarbone, your nails pressed against his back. He sucked in a breath through his teeth as he tried his best to not hurt you again. He was afraid he would go too rough.

"I... love you..." Kurapika looked into your eyes, both of you shared your feelings through a kiss, his grip tightening fully as he couldn't hold back anymore, using all his strength until he made you tremble underneath him... Until you made his back bleed with scratches... Until he knew you wouldn't be able to speak that clearly the next day... He wanted those little reminders of this night to stay with you for a little longer and to stay with him too. He never wanted to forget this.

As soon as your second time flooded through your body, that's when he let go himself, letting everything out inside of you. The feeling making you shake before he collapsed next to you.

Both of you panting. You looked at him, his hair was sticking to his forehead and his eyes back to that beautiful hue of brown. Not that his scarlet wasn't just as beautiful.

"You d-didn't let me say it back..." You huffed, pulling yourself closer to him, trying your best to recover, and like he predicted, your voice was raspy.

"Your face was saying it for you." His laugh danced through your ears like a sweet melody as he moved some of your hair behind your ear before kissing you on the forehead and getting up. "Let me get you cleaned up." His arms were felt under you before you were lifted into his hold, his smile staying on his features longer than before.

You couldn't say anymore, your vocal cords were already strained enough and he understood. He didn't even question why you didn't speak while he cleaned your body. He kept a sincere gaze, washing every single spot, not missing anything. That was until he came across your old scars, a finger tracing them before a concerned gaze met with you.

"You hurt yourself?" Kurapika's voice held a hurt but gentle tone, of course, there were multiple scars on him but he could automatically tell when it was self-harm. He couldn't just leave that.

A sad face decorated yours, looking away, and he decided to bring it up another time. "You're still beautiful." He reassured you. "I won't think anything less of you. Just informing you." He looked up at you with a warm smile and you looked at him in awe, tears brimming your eyes at the sweet words. It was like he read your mind. With that, he pulled you into a hug, soon dressing you, making sure you're comfortable and then laying with you. And as you started to fall asleep, he comforted you on the way there.

"Your secrets are safe with me... (F/N)..."

[amimimi]

dreams; kyan reki

synposis: in which you tend to reki’s wounds after his second beef with adam; second part to this fic but it can be read on it’s own! takes place after episode 11

pairings: gn! reader x reki

genre: fluff. just fluff. and caretaking.

warnings: mentions of injuries. swearing. brief nudity (?) sap, so sappy.

word count: 3.5k

notes: i loved the series so much! reki has suffered enough, so i decided to show his some love. i was so so proud of him during episode 11. again, i apologize in advance for grammatical/spelling errors. i'm pretty busy with school so i'm just churning fics out at this point.

“i’m not letting you lift a finger for a month” you moan as you help seat reki on his bed. you’re both mostly dried from the rain, save for your hair and clothes. he only giggles in response and you can’t help it when you lean down to gingerly place your hands up to his face, kissing the bridge of his nose. “a month”

“ahh, i don’t think that’s gonna work” reki gives you an easy grin, before placing a kiss on the side of you mouth. “i got a shift tomorrow”

“i’ll cover your shift” you say, stone-faced. disbelief momentarily flashes across reki’s face before he breaks out into uncontrollable giggles—the kind that erupts straight from your stomach. your hands drop from his face. “shh! i’m serious!”

he hangs his head forward and brings a hand up to his mouth, attempting to quell his giggles. “you don’t even work there, y/n!” he manages to say before delving into yet another fit of giggles. reki must’ve curled in too far because his laughter is cut off by strangled cry. immediately, you surge forward, gingerly placing your hands on his shoulders.

it wasn’t unusual for reki to be banged up from skateboarding—everything from scrapes to fractures were all pretty common for him. in the beginning of your relationship with reki, it worried you to no end, and you even begged him to wear a helmet (he said no, of course). eventually you came to accept that injuries were going to be a normal occurrence for reki. but his injuries this time were slightly different.

reki had his second beef with adam earlier that night. technically reki had lost, but it felt more like a victory instead. he came so close, and he did so well. and he was happy. seeing him like that in his element, gleaming with joy, eyes lit a flame with passion—you felt like ten years was added to your lifespan. of course, reki took quite the beating but no where near the damage of last time.

“m’fine!” he wheezes, placing a hand over his stomach. “it’s just a bruise.”

you’re not convinced and it shows on your face because reki gently places his hand on the back of your head, pulling your forehead up against his. “i’m fine, baby”

you let yourself stay there, forehead pressed against reki’s and staring right into each other’s eyes. for the first time in weeks, you felt the tightness in your chest completely dissipate. because here you were gazing into his eyes—reki’s eyes, in his darkened room, knowing he was safe and okay.

“okay,” you whisper. reki gazes at you with half-lidded eyes and attempts to press his forehead closer (if that was even possible), brushing his nose against yours. “but i gotta patch you up”.

you wiggle out of reki’s grasp, who whimpers at the loss of contact, to grab the first aid kit he’d kept in his drawer. stumbling in the dark, you feel around for his desk, flicking on the lamp. reki watches you sift through the contents of his drawer, overtaken by a sudden wave of fondness. he loves you, always has. but suddenly, in this moment, he feels the love he has for you in a new way. it pools in his stomach, warm and fuzzy, and he feels so full, so content, like he ate a whole meal.

“i love you from my stomach” reki blurts out before he’s aware of what he’s saying. from over your shoulder, you glance at him quizzically and he feels a new sensation—mortification, burn all over his face. later, he’s going to blame his misspeaking on the fact that it was so late into the night and that every inch of his body was practically throbbing in pain. but right now, he can’t form any thoughts, let alone excuses.

“huh?” you’re facing him now, first aid kit in hand and your face twitching with the urge to smile. feeling his ears burn up, reki presses his lips and shakes his head, refusing to repeat what he said. “reki~! what did you say?”

he turns his head to the side as you make your way over to the bed. “i forgot”

“no you didn’t!” you whine, throwing the first aid kit on the bed and placing your hands over his cheeks. “say it again, please?”

“ahh, i meant it like—”reki pauses, thinking about how to put his feelings into words. “i-i don’t know! i love you, but sometimes i feel it in my stomach”

“oh”, you plop down right next to him on the bed, pulling your legs up to sit crisscross. reki follows your movement, pulling his legs up on the bed and crossing them. he’s looking at expectantly. “like butterflies, yeah?”

“no, not that. this feels warm—and kinda heavy”

“oh”, you tilt your head to one side and smile coyly. “so, desire then?”

reki rolls his eyes at you, his ears still red. “you’re so—”

“desperately in love with you?” you offer with a grin before leaning and catching his lips in a noisy kiss. you pull back, but not before kissing the tip of his nose just to see his reaction. reki fights back a smile, the corners of his mouth twitching upwards as he shakes his head.

“j-just patch me up, please”, he sighs as his lips finally quirk into a smile.

“can I change first?” you ask. wet jeans felt like murder and your shirt was starting to stick in uncomfortable places on your torso. reki nods and points to his closet.

“i have clean shirts and sweatpants folded in there” he informs you, watching as you sit up and make your way over to his closet. reki’s not surprised when you grab his pink dope sketch shirt, shooting him a cheeky grin.

you start tugging off your jeans and reki looks away to give your privacy. “you’re so precious, reki” you coo at him. reki only smiles at the opposite wall and shakes his head. when you’re done, you drop your wet clothes in his laundry and walk over to him. “i’m decent!”

reki looks back at you and his heart twists at the sight of you, clad in his work shirt, hanging just above your knees and slightly hugging your waist. he prays he isn’t blushing and gulps.

“i have sweatpants if you want some, sweetheart”, he reminds you weakly, trying to stop staring.

you blink at him, lost and then you gasp. “oh, sorry! I didn’t meant to make you uncomfortable!” you rush. “i’ll put some pants on—”

“no!” he practically shouts, before squeezing his lips shut. you both hold your breaths when you hear his little sister in the next room, groan and shift in her sleep. waiting, until he’s sure it’s safe, he continues much quietly. “i’m not uncomfortable. you look really good, i love you like this. i just want you to feel comfortable”

adoration surges in your chest as you watch your boyfriend clumsily and earnestly explain himself, a blush adorned on his face. “i feel the most comfortable when i’m with you” you admit with a shy smile, your face growing warm.

reki blinks up at you for a second, looking momentarily stunned before his face morphs into a soft grin. his eyes twinkle as he holds his hands out for you, sure and steady. placing your hands in his calloused ones, you sit down beside on the bed and sit criss crossed.

the both of you sit like that for a while, staring lovingly at one another and taking turn squeezing each other’s hands. finally, you bring reki’s hands up to your lips, littering his knuckles with kisses before giving them a quick squeeze.

“where do you hurt the most?” you question, sliding your hands out of his to open the first aid kit. you skim over his injuries, not even knowing where to start. there’s a line of dried blood and a bruise forming on the right side of his face, must be a small laceration under his headband. you know his back is cut up pretty badly and you hope it’s nothing too deep.

“my whole body is sore, if i’m going to be honest” he replies sheepishly. frowning, you gently tug off his headband to assess the damage. just as you suspected, a small cut right under his hairline. the area is beginning to bruise too. you remember adam repeatedly punching him at one point, as reki had locked his arms around him... maybe reki should go to a hospital?

“I promise you i’m fine”, reki assures you, having picked up on the mounting worry on your face. he takes your hand in his, rubbing the roughened pad of his thumb over the back of your hand. “trust me! i’ve had worse. i was jumped and hit with a car all in one day and i didn’t even get a concussion”.

despite reki’s face beaming with pride, you frown deeper and fidget at the thought of reki getting hurt like that. “please don’t remind me...” you sigh, sitting up off the bed to grab a face towel from his closet. “i’m gonna run this under water, okay?”

“alright”, reki answered, watching you step out of his room to make your way to the bathroom. you hurry back, the wet towel dripping water down your forearm, and gently seat yourself on the bed.

you arrange yourself so that you are sitting criss cross in front of reki. “I’m going to clean it, alright?” you say, before leaning into give him a peck.

“okay” he murmurs, placing his hand on your knee. reki squeezes hard when you gently press the wet towel against his wound. you do this repeatedly until you make sure there’s no visible dirt around the wound before placing the towel on reki’s bedside table. you’re quick to patch up his forehead before placing a gentle kiss over the bandage. he snickers through his nose at this, squeezing your knee once more.

“now for your back...” you purse your lips. “take your shirt off.”

you’ve seen reki shirtless a thousand times before and he knows this. still, he can’t help but squirm under your gaze as he works at removing the layers of clothing he’s wearing. he takes his jacket off fine but he struggles a bit with his hoodie, still damp from the rain, wincing as he tugs upward on the fabric.

“here, lemme help you”, you murmur, sitting forward on your knees to tug his hoodie upwards and over his head. you work at the white t-shirt he had on under his hoodie next. gently as you could, you peeled the shirt off reki’s torso trying not to disturb his wounds. but he still flinches, sucking a quick breath in. “sorry! i’m sorry!”

“no, no! you’re fine, it just stung a little” reki promises you, giving your thigh a squeeze. you tug the t-shirt over his head, grimacing. his torso is littered with bruises and a few scrapes, but nothing too worrisome.

“okay, lemme see your back”, you tell him, bracing yourself as you crawl around him get a full glimpse. just as you thought, his back is scraped up and still bleeding lightly—nothing too deep. you grab the wet towel on his bedside table and hop off the bed to go run it under the bathroom facet.

when you return, reki is sitting on his bed exactly like you left, watching you tip toe over to him. “do you wanna take off your pants?” you ask, folding the wet towel. “maybe change into something dry?”

“um, yeah actually...” reki mutters, fumbling with his belt. “c-could you grab me some sweatpants? please?”

with the wet towel in one hand, you grab a pair of gray sweatpants from reki’s closet with your other hand. you can hear reki shuffling out of his pants as you walk over to the bed, with your face turned away.

you hold the sweatpants out for him, your face turned to the side. “you don’t have to look away if you don’t want to”, reki tells you and you can hear the smile in his voice. he takes the sweatpants from your hands.

“you gave me privacy, so i’m returning to the favor—give me your wet clothes, i’ll put them in the hamper”

you trade off the wet towel for reki’s clothes, wheeling around to place them in his hamper. when you turn back, reki is sitting with his legs hanging over the edge of the bed, wearing just his sweatpants and holding the wet towel in one hand.

“whenever you’re ready, nurse y/n”, he smiles at you, showing his teeth. you squint your eyes at him playfully and shuffle over to his bed. accepting the wet towel from reki, you crawl behind him so that you have full access to his back.

“okay, i’m going to clean your wounds, let me know if i’m hurting you”, you warn him, folding your legs underneath you. he grunts in response. taking a breath to steel yourself, you gently press the towel against the abrasions. suddenly, reki gasps loudly. you squeak and pull back almost immediately, your heart in your throat. “what?”

reki’s back is shaking and to your relief (and horror), you realize reki is laughing. he turns his head around to catch a glimpse at your expression and laughs so hard, he snorts and it almost makes you laugh—almost.

“i’m sorry, i couldn’t help it”, he gasps between laughs.

you suck your teeth. “well, now that it’s out of your system, can you hold still? i seriously don’t want to hurt you” you reposition yourself, heart still hammering in your chest.

“sorry, angel, go ahead”, he stifles a giggle, holding still. hesitantly, you press the wet towel to abrasions on his back.

“that okay?” you question and he nods. taking another breath, you dab his entire span of his back with the towel, stopping every now and then to check in on him. once you’ve cleaned his wounds up, you dig around in the first aid kit for some gauze sponges to pat his back dry. “i’m gonna wrap you up for tonight but you should let it dry tomorrow, okay?”

“you got it, nurse” reki chimes back and you bite back a smile, reaching for the gauze dressing in the first aid kit. once you’ve placed the dressing over the worst of his wounds, you grab the gauze roll and begin to wrap it around reki’s torso.

at one point, your fingers brush up against his side and his breath slightly hitches. you freeze, giving him a concerned hum.

“i’m ticklish” he whispers sheepishly and you smirk, continuing to wrap the gauze around his torso.

“storing this information for later, thank you!” you tease causing reki groans. “i didn’t wrap it too tight, did i? can you breathe?”

“i can breathe fine, don’t worry” reki sighs, as you loosely tie the gauze. “you did great, thank you”

once you’re done tying the gauze, you place your hands on top of reki’s shoulders. “good?” you ask.

“good”, reki nods. you take in reki’s bandaged back, his slightly toned shoulders, his red hair pressed against nape of his neck, even the back of his head. he look’s so good with his hair down.

before you even know what you’re doing, you gently press your lips against the nape of his neck. reki freezes, his shoulder tensing before you press another kiss along the back of his neck. he shivers and his whole body melts. you kiss again, this time further up the nape of his neck and into his hair and he lets his head hang forward, sighing slightly. another kiss is placed where his neck meets his shoulder, and he has to bite back a whimper.

“i’m so proud of you”, you whisper into the back of his neck. he reaches around to squeeze your hand. “you did so great tonight—you’re always so great, you never fail to amaze me.”

upon hearing your words, reki feels a lump form in his throat. you always told him that, how proud you were of him for doing things he thought were exceedingly mundane. he remembers that night he was panicking in your bathroom, shaking on his legs like a newborn deer and barely managing to control his breathing. how even then, you were proud of him, for what exactly? he couldn’t answer.

but now, when you tell him that with your lips soft against his nape, in the darkness of his room, he believes you. he’s banged up and unbelievably sore, but he believes you. and further more, he’s feeling proud of himself too, for not disappointing himself, for doing what he had come to do at that beef.

reki shifts around, so that he’s facing you to see that you're smiling at him in a way that he could only describe as pure adoration.

“and...” you start, pushing his bangs back from his forehead. “you looked so fucking hot”.

reki eyes widened slightly before he blows air out of his mouth and rolls his eyes. you grab his face, forcing him to look at you.

“no, no! but you actually looked really good?” you giggled, squeezing his cheeks between your hands. “like, when you nailed that landing off that cliff? and when you dodged him like that? like, i knew you could move, but you were really moving, you know—?”

“y/n—”reki starts, grinning pretty hard as he tries to advert his gaze from yours.

“and you were smiling so hard, like you were actually glowing—beaming! i don’t know, something about the way you looked under those lights they have at S...i actually wanted to bark, like wow—”

“y/n, shut up!” reki is giggling now, flushed right down to his chest. he tries to wrestle your hands from off his face, but you kept your grip.

“don’t act all shy now, mister! you knew exactly what you were doing! when you were like ‘and you’d better remember it’, i was this close to dropping to my knees—”

“y/n—”

“and every one was screaming your name and i was just like ‘yea, that’s my boyfriend! my man! my prince—!’”

suddenly, reki flips you over pinning you arms right beside your head, the both of you giggling.

“oh my god, why are you still going” reki half groans between giggles as you continue to cackle.

“my sweetheart, my baby, my sweat pea, my darling, the future of father of my children, my honey bunch, my sugar pie, the apple of my eye, the light of my life—” you list off, delirious with laughter, not even fighting against reki’s grip on your forearms. he hovers over you, laughing too, his eyes shining and his face beaming

“you need to stop” reki shakes his head slightly, his bangs falling onto your forehead as he leans in for a kiss. he pulls back and you're silent for a moment...until you start rattling off corny pet names again, but this time less giggly.

“my sun, my moon, my stars, my whole world—” you murmur before reki presses his lips against yours. he pulls away and kisses the tip of your nose, the skin slightly under your right eye, and onto your left eyelid.

“you’re so annoying”, reki whispers, letting go of your forearms to hold your face instead.

“you kinda are too”, you whisper back, placing your hands over his, rubbing your thumbs along the back of his hand.

“mmm, i guess we’re destined for one another then” he murmurs and you nod, fervently. reki kisses you sweetly and you hum against his lips. “i love you so much”.

“i love you too, baby” you sigh, putty in reki’s hands. he looks so pretty above you, the lamplight reflecting his eyes and his cheeks still flushed. he looks like the human embodiment of honey.

you turn your head over to glimpse at the alarm clock on his bed side table. 3:37 AM

“our sleeping schedules are so messed up” you groan turning your head back to look up at reki. he blinks, following your gaze towards the alarm clock.

“oh, i usually sleep around his time anyway” he shrugs.

“okay, but you have injuries...so you need to rest to heal” you reason while sitting up slightly, forcing reki to sit up with you. “are you still in pain? i can get you a tylenol”

“i’ll need one in the morning, but i’m fine for now”, he assures you with a grin.

you both climb under his blankets, but he wants for you to sit back against his pillows. already knowing, you hold your arms out for him and he lays between your legs, wrapping his arms around your torso. reki presses his ear to chest, taking in the steady rhythm of your heartbeat, as you smooth his hair back.

“goodnight, sweetheart” you whisper, leaving your hand in his hair.

“goodnight, baby” he murmurs into you chest, pressing a kiss there. “i love you, i can’t wait to wake up and see you tomorrow”

you chuckle tiredly. “i love you too, i’ll see you in the morning”.

notes: this was also, long as hell. i apologize! this is honestly the sappiest sh*t i’ve ever written, idk if it can get any sappier than this (it probably can, and will >:3) .

[theanimeview]

PPPPPP - Why I Keep Reading a Music Manga That I Can’t Fully Recommend (Review/Analysis)

Source: VIZ Media, https://www.viz.com/shonenjump/chapters/pppppp?locale=en

By: Beata Garrett  | @zhongxia246​​

PPPPPP is a manga about a family of geniuses with piano superpowers, and it’s everything I expected something with that premise to be, yet underwhelming in ways that I’ll do my best to describe. I feel like it’s the kind of work you’d read if you want to read a mashup of The Umbrella Academy and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, but I can’t promise you’ll have as good of a time consuming it in comparison to either. 

When I wrote this review, there were only 16 chapters available on VIZ, but the representations of music in it has been stuck in my mind since I began reading it in September (2021). I’ll delve into the art later, but will focus on PPPPPP’s themes and plot first.

What It’s About

The protagonist, Lucky Sonoda, is the only mediocre child in a family of piano-virtuosos but continues loving it from afar while taking care of his ill, hospitalized mother. 

He’s like other shounen main characters: he’s optimistic, resilient, and has a deep passion for something he may not have the talent for even though the rest of his family does.

Since his parents’ divorce ten years ago, Lucky has been sidelined in the family as the untalented and oft forgotten seventh child of what should be the Otogami Septuplets. From the sidelines, he’s been forced to watch people fawn over his genius siblings, called the “Otogami Sextuplet Pianists,” along with having his surname changed to their mother’s, hence him being the only “Sonoda” of the seven children.  

Source: Chapter 1, PPPPPP

Lucky now lives with his aunt from his mother’s side and her spoiled son rather than his father or mother. The trauma of Gakuon and the aunt’s abuse are clearly affecting him, but he doesn’t blame anyone else other than himself--regularly attributing their terrible treatment of him to his mediocrity at the piano. He also blames himself for separating his mom from the rest of the siblings because he sees himself as the cause of their divorce, and is unable to imagine any future with his siblings as a result. 

He doesn’t exist to the family, especially to its patriarch, Gakuon, or to the rest of the world.

Source: Chapter 1, PPPPPP

Everything changes when his mother encourages Lucky to become a pianist because she loves his playing. She tells him to also prove his father wrong by showing him that anyone, including the mediocre, can play the piano. This is only the beginning of his journey into the musical profession that will inevitably draw him deeper into the world of his siblings and father.

Meaning in The Title

PPPPPP stands for pianissimo (or, pianississimo if you prefer the British-English spelling) repeated twice. A pianissimo note should be played very, very softly. In terms of voice, this would be even softer than a whisper. Playing pianissimo is difficult because you can’t hit keys with the typical force you would use, but it helps train your sensitivity to subtleties in music. 

Source: https://socratic.org/questions/what-does-ppp-stand-for-in-music

I do like how pianissimo represents Lucky’s gentle nature and soft playing--a tendency born from playing for his mother in the hospital. It nicely contrasts the more aggressive styles of the siblings raised by Gakuon. 

It wasn’t a bad trait to give Lucky in and of itself, but when combined with the power of granting wishes by recreating reality... well, that makes him overpowered. 

To be fair, unlike other music-focused manga, PPPPPP tries to tackle experiential-visual music as though it’s really happening rather than some fantasy the listener is simply imagining. It’s really interesting that, instead, Lucky is creating these images himself with music and sharing it with his listeners. In my search, I haven’t found anything that fits this in reality besides sound-color synesthetes (a form of synesthesia), a phenomenon in which one can associate music with colors. There’s also visual music, but that requires artists to make a visual component based on the music, which is not expressed within the manga. Moreover, I haven’t seen this brought out in other manga or comics before either. 

Chapter 12, PPPPPP

That said, PPPPPP’s idea, though great in visualizing music most of the time, also feels like a shortcut to avoid the more difficult issues that face any artist about their self-worth in their chosen field.

What makes this stand out is how clear of a level difference Lucky has compared to his peers. After all, once Lucky enters Shibuya Music High School, it’s clear that he’s below his peers in terms of skill and knowledge. He’s unable to discern notes that are played or follow along with much of what’s being said. However, despite this, his mentor, Hideo, tells him that his playing is special because of his history, desire, and its softness.

Source: Chapter 2, PPPPPP

While being able to play pianissimo better than other pianists allows Lucky to stand out and understand the nuances of his pieces better, it doesn’t compensate for other necessary techniques. It also puts him at a disadvantage for pieces that require louder emotions like joy or anger. 

I expected the manga to raise questions about authenticity, skill, and talent, and the worth of these traits in discerning the winner or best pianist in a competition. These are topics that have been raised frequently in sports manga like Haikyuu and Ping Pong, and music manga like Blue Giant and Blue Orchestra. One of the marks of a great sports or music manga is how they’ll approach these deeper themes of competition, talent, and skill.

Source: Chapter 3, PPPPPP

When Lucky begins competing with others, PPPPPP removes a lot of the musical complexity from the plot. For the first competition, Hideo challenges Lucky and Ako, a girl with perfect pitch, to compete. They have to play “Pavane pour une infante défunte.” It is a piece intended to be played very slowly, and Hideo advises Lucky to use his talent to take the listener to another place, as seen in the image above. 

There’s no clear winner of the battle, as Ako is technically superior in her playing, but Lucky passes by granting Ako’s “wish.” Her wish is for her mother to pat her on the head like she used to, and Lucky grants it through his playing of the piece using his magical powers. 

Chapter 3, PPPPPP

Unlike the other Otogamis, Lucky can only bring others into his memories and can’t conjure anything he hasn’t experienced. It’s a good limitation to his powers, but he remains a horrible player on a technical level and has to rely on it to win all of his competitions. 

Because of this magic that so many people seem to ‘magically’ appreciate, there isn’t a great need to improve his technical skills and so, instead, he focuses on choosing a memory to bring someone into rather than developing holistically as a pianist. 

This scene is what made me realize that PPPPPP is best when it’s centered on the Otogami family and their issues rather than deeper themes of musical composure, competition, or innate talent versus earned skills. 

When Lucky battles his siblings, the manga utilizes his power to create very strong emotional moments, often reflecting on how his father has hurt him, and thereby helping his siblings begin to break free of their father’s abuse. It is a far more interesting and cohesive part of the story than nearly any focus on the musical profession or education. 

The Six Otagamis of the Septuplets 

Source: Chapter 3, PPPPPP

In PPPPPP, Gakuon (their father) uses emotional and physical abuse on his children so they stay by his side. This is seen primarily in the isolation tactics used on Lucky, showing his siblings what happens when you don’t have talent, but certainly expands when looking at the other six.  

The lives of Lucky’s siblings revolve around winning to earn their father’s approval and to grab any chance of agency in their micromanaged lives. All of them are assigned their own personal manager who report directly to Gakuon, and are unable to even dream of quitting the piano.

Their father’s influence is revealed best in Reijiro’s flashback to the only time he lost, albeit purposefully, to someone. Gakuon punished Reijiro physically by slapping him and later tells his son, “You’ll never be normal. Your only friend is the piano” (Chapter 9, PPPPPP). It also served as reinforcement for the other children who wanted to avoid being treated the same way, each of whom watch and even shamed Reijiro further, thereby perpetuating the abuse:

Source: Chapter 9, PPPPPP

While Lucky has also been abused by his aunt, he was able to have a semblance of normalcy through his mother. Moreover, by leaving the aunt to go pursue music at his new school, he’s able to advance and gain freedoms beyond what his siblings have had under Gakuon. 

When Lucky plays in the competition against Reijiro and fulfills Reijiro’s wish to walk home with a friend, he thinks, “Reijiro’s wish is just normal for me. But that ordinary experience is what [Reijiro’s] been tearfully longing for” (Chapter 12, PPPPPP).

After Lucky finishes, Reijiro hugs him and requests that they go back home and Lucky play the piece for him everyday. However, Lucky gently reminds him that that would be escaping reality and he wants all of his siblings to get the opportunity to live in the real world. 

Source: Chapter 12, PPPPPP

It’s a powerful goal that’s made effective because it comes from a member of the family that has already been abused and abandoned. It’s not from some random stranger who wants to save some children--which would be fine but not as emotionally impactful. 

These abused siblings can understand each other on a deeper level in many ways, so I appreciate PPPPPP addressing the ways in which they react to each other and to their abuser. In this case, the abuser is their parent and mentor, and that makes for an even more complicated relationship because they’re two positions that society teaches you to not fight back against. It’s hard to read, but powerful. 

Source: Chapter 16, PPPPPP

Another interesting example of how trauma manifests itself is in Lucky’s sister, Mimin. She’s sent to Japan to win as many competitions as she can for their father, and is personally invested in this mission because she believes beating all the pianists who lose to her will allow her to play the piano style she wants. 

Her logic is that people who enter competitions and win become judges, judges who restrict the freedom that can be found in piano. She’s not interested in whether a piece is “good” but wants to "live freely” and feels she can only do so if there are no other pianists to be compared against (Chapter 16, PPPPPP).

Mimin hasn’t realized yet that she doesn’t live freely because of Gakuon and that he’s redirecting her frustration towards other pianists who could be her friends, and not her enemy. It shows how far Gakuon’s ideology has taken root within his kids and prevented them from living fulfilling lives.

The Art

Now onto the fun part: the art. PPPPPP is visually striking with its way of depicting music through “fantasies” that are sometimes whimsical and sometimes painfully realistic. These are a few examples of the more whimsical panels:

Source: Starting top-left, going clockwise: Chapter 1, Chapter 8, Chapter 16, Chapter 5, PPPPPP

While it could benefit from changing the art style in the same way Blue Period does by hiring different artists, I still enjoy PPPPPP’s present style. 

The more realistic panels are emotionally impactful as they reveal the deep desires of the people Lucky plays for, such as when his playing conjures up a sunset and a friend for his brother Reijiro:

Source: Chapter 12, PPPPPP

There’s another great scene where Lucky allows a classmate to briefly taste his dream of being good enough to receive a standing ovation through his music:

Source: Chapter 7, PPPPPP

The classmate himself doesn’t really matter, but everyone can relate to that desire to be seen and appreciated by others. As a musician, standing ovations are an acknowledgement that your music has resonated with the audience and it’s bittersweet to see someone want it so badly in comparison to the Otogamis, who receive them so much that they’ve become bored of it.

It’s little moments like this that keep me returning to this manga and I applaud the mangaka, MAPOLLO 3, for creating a music manga that visualizes the experience of playing and listening to music in a way I haven’t seen before. 

Conclusion

I really hope the manga treats each Otogami with dignity and consideration. So far, MAPOLLO 3’s done a decent, if simplistic, job with Reijiro and Mimin, so I’m curious to see if they can keep it up with the other kids. 

Unfortunately, other parts of the story thus far have remained tedious in comparison. It’s hard to care about Lucky fulfilling some random classmate’s dream or believe in his new friendship with Ako when those characters have no personality and little time with him.

PPPPPP’s message isn’t unique or excellently done, but the way it combines a mix of realistic and fantastical art with its (touch-and-go) emotionally resonant story keeps me coming back. On that same note, the music is not for an elite audience or elite pianists but is for everyone, including the mediocre.

In the end, the message appears to be that the true growth and healthy self-value as a pianist comes from loving piano and learning from other pianists instead of dominating them.